Long before you get to the end of your questions, most successful agents will have asked for your phone numbers and an appointment. If the agent does not, he or she may not be assertive enough.

Communication skills

How the agent communicates with you is a reflection of how good a job he or she will do in communicating for you, e.g., when presenting a purchase contract to the seller on your behalf. The key attribute in effective communication is the ability to listen. Top professionals do this very well. They want to understand your needs from the start in order to best help you.

Your first contact with the agent may be at an open house, calling on a newspaper ad or sign, or a referral from someone you know. Regardless, the best agents usually request a face-to-face meeting during this first conversation. This is known as a buyer interview or buyer “probe.” The purpose is for you to interview each other.

Be wary of agents who want to immediately get you into their car and show you property without first taking the time to find out what you want and why. This cannot be done effectively in a short chat at an open house, on the phone or in the car. If you are serious about buying, you should be delighted to take the opportunity to meet with a good agent. To reassure buyers, I always stress there will be no obligation, on their part or mine, unless we mutually decide to work together.

The first interview

Now you are in the agent’s office. Keep in mind that 55 percent of all communication is nonverbal; 38 percent is related to tone of voice; and only 7 percent is words. Use this knowledge when observing the agent and notice how he or she is attentive to you.

You will be able to tell relatively quickly how good a listener the agent is and whether he or she is listening to understand or listening to reply. It will not be difficult to discern who is doing most of the talking. Let the agent take the lead; you will learn more about him or her that way.

Excellent communicators spend up to 80 percent  of the time listening, not talking. After all, how much can I learn about you and your situation from talking? This is why effective listeners ask numerous, open-ended questions, ones that cannot be answered simply “yes” or “no.” Agents who talk at you do the same with everybody. This will work against you, especially in negotiating.

One technique to assist in communicating is called “reflective listening,” where the listener repeats or paraphrases what you have just said. What better way to know that someone has really heard and understood you? For example, you might say, “It is important for us to be in our new home by mid-August so we can get the kids situated in their new schools.” If the agent then addresses the factors involved in closing escrow by mid-August, you know he or she was listening. If he babbles, “Let me explain why my company is the biggest and best in the area,” this would be a clue to keep looking. You don’t need to be convinced. You need to be understood.

Discovering your motivation

The most significant thing for you to communicate, and for the agent to know, is your motivation. Why are you in the market to buy at this time? Are you downsizing because the kids have moved out? Do you or does someone in your family have a health problem? Did you just get transferred from out-of-town with a big promotion? Or were you transferred with a salary cut in order to avoid losing your job?

Understanding your “why” is everything. Rarely, however, do buyers quickly and easily disclose this vital information. The most capable professionals gear all their questions to uncover your motivation. The right series of questions, when answered by you openly, will always reveal your reasons for buying. An agent must be clear on this in order to do a truly effective job for you.

Obviously, you will divulge personal details only if you feel comfortable and trust the agent. You will know in an hour or so if you have this trust. By that time, the agent should be able to summarize your situation to your satisfaction. If this is so, and the Realtor meets other criteria I will cover later, you have found yourself an agent. You will have the beginnings of a positive relationship that can endure for years.

My wife and I are fortunate to have made a number of lasting friendships with people who started out as clients. This continues to be one of my greatest joys about being in the business.

Related Articles:  How to Interview Agents, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4; Use Local Agent; Clarifying Reality; Another New Contract, Part 1 and Part 2; Not Just Termites, Part 1 and Part 2; Are Permits Important?; Check Drainage; What Is A Bedroom?; Understanding The Market